Hetero anti gay memes
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Social media is a playground of performative disidentification, and heteropessimism thrives there. Even incels, overflowing with heteropessimism, stress the involuntary nature of their condition. Sure, some heteropessimists act on their beliefs, choosing celibacy or the now largely outmoded option of political lesbianism, yet most stick with heterosexuality even as they judge it to be irredeemable. That these disaffiliations are “performative” does not mean that they are insincere but rather that they are rarely accompanied by the actual abandonment of heterosexuality. Heteropessimism generally has a heavy focus on men as the root of the problem. Heteropessimism consists of performative disaffiliations with heterosexuality, usually expressed in the form of regret, embarrassment, or hopelessness about straight experience. What I now see is that Nelson’s caveat is typical of heteropessimism, a mode of feeling with a long history, and which is particularly palpable in the present. Heterosexuality is nobody’s personal problem. It doesn’t make sense to extricate your own straight experience from straightness as an institution-if you are embarrassed by one, you are necessarily embarrassed by the other. Of all people, Nelson knows her queer theory, and thus knows that her own heterosexual experience only comes into focus via the cultural delineation of heterosexuality from other (less embarrassing?) forms of intimacy and attachment. Denying that she is embarrassed by heterosexuality in general, Nelson claimed that she is only humiliated by her own heterosexuality, by moments in her life when she has entertained-or suffered from-a romantic attraction to cis men.Īt the time this caveat struck me as both unnecessarily defensive and disingenuous. Yet when I asked her about it during a Skype call held by a sexuality-studies workshop for graduate students, she backtracked. Nelson’s confession has always struck me as diagnostic of our current moment, in which indictments of heterosexuality have become something of a meme. Always embarrasses me,” Maggie Nelson admits in The Argonauts, a book once so rabidly popular among women and queers that my first copy was swiped from my bag at a dyke bar in 2016.